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Thoughts on the Deluge March 20, 2012

Posted by Stormy in General Whinging, Pandaria, Sweating Bullet Points.

Hi, remember me? (cue chorus of “No?”)

So #mistsmonday has come and gone, and I guess this is the time when we’re all supposed to prematurely react to things we know very little about. The forums and every WoW-related website in the Netherweb are aflame with speculation, conjecture, poorly-constructed arguments and FEVERISH POSTS IN ALL CAPS. It’s time to rant and/or squee about the things we found out yesterday, and, well, who am I to crash a good party?

The Good:

  • The scenery is absolutely beautiful. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a zone that gives me the same chills as Howling Fjord or Feralas, a place that seems magical and ethereally beautiful while still feeling like a real place and not a cartoonish fantasy. While I’ll concede that the people crying about Asian genericism may have a point, the lush forests, imposing temples and new animals are amazing.
  • The “yaktauren,” as I’ve dubbed them, are one of the coolest-looking races in all of Azeroth. I’m partial to the peaceful-yet-imposing Tauren as it is, but the new yaktauren are amazing.
  • I’m really looking forward to the new dungeons, Stormstout Brewery in particular.
  • Say what you want about rehashing old content, but I’m beyond excited about heroic Scholomance. Scholo is deliciously creepy–the cobwebs, the zombified students, the skeletons in every closet–I just love everything about it, and I can’t wait to get in there. On a personal level, I’ve seen so many bad tanks fail miserably at tanking the first room in Scholo that I’ve finally learned what *not* to do. I enjoy expertly pulling the tightly-packed mobs with flair and poise, and I may actually try tanking H Scholo when it’s here. OH ALSO TOO AMG LILIAN VOSS YOU GUYS LILIAN VOSS.
  • Three words: Garrosh bites it. In order for this to happen and for both the Horde and Alliance to be so angry at him that they want him dead, clearly he had to have done something pretty heinous. I’m left wondering which much-loved Alliance character(s) days are numbered.
  • One-and-a-half words: PERMATREE. I giggled like a schoolgirl reading about the new cosmetic glyphs for druids. Astral boomchicken, rideable stag, orca, permatree…the only dilemma is choosing between them.

The Bad:

  • No new character models…at least not yet. I really had my heart set on this one. Don’t get me wrong–I love each and every one of my toons the way they are, and I may shed a few tears the first time I see a new-and-improved Tormenta. I’ve grown accustomed to her face. That said, the human models are cartoonishly garish, and the druid forms do indeed need a makeover.
  • WoW goes Farmville. As I said on Twitter yesterday, I’d like to see a Venn diagram showing the overlap between WoW players and Farmville players. I’ll bet there’s not much overlap. While I can appreciate that not everyone raids and that many people have been crying for minigames to play within WoW, seeing that Blizzard just lifted Pokemon and Farmville from existing platforms is a little scary.
  • I spent some time tonight looking around for the official explanation of the new LFR loot rules and never found it. All I found was QQ, conjecture and ranting. If someone could link the actual content of the announcement from Blizzard, that’d be swell.

The Ugly:

  • Just one in this category, but it’s a big one. Take a minute right now and point another browser tab to your search engine of choice. Search for “panda.” Then search for “male panda” and “female panda.” Go ahead, I’ll wait. Welcome back! Notice anything? You can’t tell the difference between a male panda and a female panda…unless you buy it a few drinks first. So why on Earth we’re graced with this Jessica Rabbit-inspired pandaren geisha is beyond me. While I’m ready to go ahead and concede that sexual dimorphism is necessary in WoW character models, is it really necessary for her to be so a) sexually suggestive, and b) syrupy-sweet? If you go back and look at the existing character models (even the much-ballyhooed female worgen), none of them have a default facial expression that says much beyond boredom and or apathy. They’re all straight-faced and straight-laced. The female pandaren, on the other hand, seems torn between inviting you for an afternoon picking flowers in Lollipop Meadow or an evening rocking your world between the sheets. Besides being wholly unnecessary in a game universe that barely even broaches the subject of sex and sexuality, it flies in the face of what World of Warcraft is all about. That hot little redhead couldn’t kill a fly much less a Sha, and seems to have no interest in either.


1. Rush - March 20, 2012

Blizz seems intentionally vague thus far, probably since they don’t want to tie themselves in yet. But from what I’ve gleaned, there are X number of winners determined for each boss. Those winners are given and class and spec appropriate piece of loot randomly from that boss’s loot table. If no such item exists, you get gold.

And no one else in the raid sees what you get unless you link it.

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